You're so vain.

One thing I will never understand is what exactly takes these guys so long in the bathroom.

Now, I like to look as attractive as the next girl. I have been known to do my fair share of primping. I feel like I'm an average amount of vain. I probably don't think this song is about me or anything, but I do like to look good and will spend a fair amount of time doing so.

But these boys. God damn.

This past weekend, I was in a play and three of my wonderful boys drove down for two hours to see it. They came in a few hours before the show so we were able to have dinner and relax before it was time to go. I had told them that my call time was at 7 so that we were all on the same schedule.

About an hour before we had to leave, the boys started trickling inside to begin their primping regime. I sat outside for a little longer, because I knew that they needed ample time to get ready to be seen by the public.

There were multiple wardrobe changes. One section of hair got flat-ironed three separate times. Three times. I know this because I watched. An ozone hole's worth of hairspray was applied to their hair. And I had to physically move a toiletry bag out of my way so I could wash my face and brush my teeth, and you do not even want to know the bitchface I was given for doing that. I was the one who was going to be onstage in front of hundreds of people, yet I was the one who had to fight for counter space.

It is exhausting trying to keep up with the bathroom habits of these guys. On the one hand, it has made me pay more attention to my appearance, because god knows they would not let me be seen in public if I had not swished it up a bit. On the other hand......it takes an hour for them to get ready to go out for the day. By the time they're ready for the day, it's almost time to get ready to go out for the night -- and that takes even longer.