Life is a Drag

Over Christmas break, I went up to Dallas to visit friends and we subsequently went to S4 to see their drag show. I've seen many a drag show in my day and love every incarnation, including Rupaul's Drag Race on LOGO. But whether professional or amateur, there are a few staples that are necessary for a great time:  

1. A great emcee. Nothing ruins a night faster than an emcee who isn't funny or entertaining, or the lack of an emcee, with the DJ announcing the girls. Emcees are incredibly important: they need to be spontaneous and respond to the audience without being overly vulgar. There's a difference between joking and insulting and a good emcee (with a good audience) can toe the line magnificently.  

2. A good audience. Don't try to be funnier than the emcee, because you will not win. Have fun while still being courteous to both the girls and the other audience members. Basically, don't be an ass. Have fun but don't spoil the rest of the audience's fun.  

3. Tip! Tipping is not mandatory but is the best way of showing your appreciation for the show. If you're going to tip, then don't make them work for the money -- don't hold on to it and "make" them perform for you in order to get it. They're working their asses off for everybody, and you're included in that. Let them get their money and move on! They're earning every bit of it.  

4. Performers need to know the words to the songs. This is one of my pet peeves. Yeah yeah, they're lip syncing, which means they don't necessarily have to know the words, but come on. Nothing takes me out of a show faster than a performer moving their mouth like a fish and pronouncing random syllables that do not in anyway sound like the song they're supposed to be performing. Ladies: pick a song you know, and then perform the shit out of it.

 5. Keep the music topical. There are the obvious gay anthems that are staples in shows, but if you're performing a random 70s disco song that no one in the audience knows, you're just setting yourself up for a boring show. I may be biased in this one, but my favorite performances have been queens that dress as Beyonce, Gaga, or Britney and rocked the shit out of a medley. The Beyonce queens are my favorite, I must admit.

It's probably sad how much thought I've put into what makes a good drag show, but there you go. Go, drink, and hope that I never figure out how to pull a Connie and Carla because I will take my drag show on the road and it will be a GLORIOUS show.