Oh helllllll no.

I may have mentioned this before, but I teach at a public high school. My students are teenagers. They are also mostly assholes.

Yesterday I had a moment that I referred to as "going fabulous," but that my students referred to as "going ghetto."

It was the last period of the day. I was tired and stressed out. And maaaybe a little cranky. Nobody knows the trouble I've seen when it comes to these kids, I'm telling you. So one of my lovelies, in the last period of the day, decided that he had "done enough work for the day," meaning that he wanted to sit and talk to another student and sleep and just generally get on my nerves.

Oh helllllll no.

I pointed my finger at him, I gave a snap or two, I wagged my head in a particularly sassy manner, and I told him that if he did not get to work right that second then I was going to come over that desk and rip his eyelids off and shove them in his mouth.

"Because then your EYES WILL BE OPEN and your MOUTH WILL BE CLOSED and if you say ONE MORE WORD SO HELP ME.......THREAT!? YOU THINK THAT SOUNDS LIKE A THREAT!? Give me the stinkeye one more time and I'LL SHOW YOU A THREAT!"

Once he (wisely) went back to work, I smoothed my hair back down and excused myself for going fabulous on his ass.

Needless to say, the class was silent until the end of the day.