The Not-so-Gay Panic.

Boys, boy, boys. When will you learn that you can keep nothing from me? The truth always comes out in the end. Take this conversation, for example:

Him: I just didn't get that much sleep last night.

Me: Oh, why not?

Him: I sort of had a panic attack.

Me: What!? What happened, what about?

Him: Oh......nothing.

Me: .......................I'm sorry, what?

It turns out that his neighbors had a party while He was imbibing just as heartily as the miscreants next door. The cops came to shut the neighbor's party down and He thought that he was being busted as well. When someone knocked on the door, He ran to the bathroom and spent an hour and a half pretending to take a shower. An hour and a half.

Nothing, my Aunt Fanny.